October 27, 2015

Life Crisis

I went to a meetup last Sunday to see Halloween Parade in Kawasaki last Sunday. It’s my 1st meetup and it wasn’t great…… but one person asked me what my job is and I said I’m an exchange student. Then he asked me again what I want to be after I graduate, and I said I don’t know. Then he said you must be a 1st year student then, and I said……………….I’m actually on my last year. That moment made me realize “damn I still don’t know what to do after uni and I’m already on my last year (hopefully)!”.

I’m majoring on Computer Science, but I’m seriously not good at it. I can still handle html and css, which is like the easiest programming language. But it’s really hard for me to understand other programming languages! 
A few months ago, I talked to my friends perhaps we should create an event organizer. Then last week, I talked to my other friends about creating a wedding organizer (thanks to Chelsea and Glenn’s wedding) because we’re kinda lost atm. I don’t give too much hope on this though, because they already failed to maintain their commitment about the craze and crave blog. I feel like they’d also be hopeless if we’re about to create a business together.
I’ve always wanted to work at a concert, as a lighting staff or something. I watched laruku’s concerts and the always have amazing lightings! That’s my inspiration for it. However, I’m not sure if I can get it though because I have no degree related to it. And I think some universities (overseas) offer a degree about stage production. I wish I’d known about it sooner!!! :’(
I’ve also always loved fashion. Becoming a fashion designer or fashion stylist often comes to my mind. I want to be a fashion designer because sometimes I just can’t find the right clothes that I want to wear (that’d like killing two birds with one stone, right?). And I also want to be a fashion stylist because I’m pretty confident with my fashion sense. However, I don’t have the money to buy them all lol. So dressing up someone who can afford those some really wonderful clothes would be enough for me. And there’s so many different style that can be made soooooo I’m really eager to be it!
I thought I’d just work at that place where my mother happens to have connection with. But that business isn’t going really well in Indonesia so I’m not sure if it’s a secure job for at least 5 years in the future……… unless if I continue doing it in Japan lol.
and something I realized just now…. I’m so focus on my career and I don’t even have time to think about my love life. Honestly I don’t see anyone would be with me (in a serious relationship) 5 years from now. Oh man…. I’ll be getting married as an old lady…… and I used to want to get married before 25 :/

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